14 Jan The week ahead: January 12th through January 18th:
Ok, kids…let’s talk about boundaries today. First of all, I’m terrible at setting them. I have a tendency to let whomever push and break boundaries all the time. As someone who is a human being, it behooves me to surround myself with people who respect normal boundaries and don’t take advantage of me or my time. I was taught as a young child that setting boundaries isn’t loving towards those around me. If something is required of me, a person should be able to come and get what they need. The end. No questions asked. To give of yourself wholly is what God wants me to do, and I need to respect God’s wishes, no matter what it costs me. As an adult, I understand this isn’t true or right, but my propensity towards giving all of myself is still there. I realized the other day that I’m still carrying this idea with me as a way of being deserving of love. If I did everything right and let you take everything from me, then I did everything I could to show you how much I care. Then, and only then, would I be able to receive the love I so obviously crave. Not only is this detrimental to my health and well being, it always leaves me feeling like I’m completely drained and less than. How am I loving myself if I continue this behavior? I’m not, so my next choice is to release this compulsion. I can only really do that if I start to fill the void that remains with self-love. That’s where saying no comes in…I HATE THAT WORD. I do. I hate it. I feel awful when I say it, and I always feel like I need to explain myself once it leaves my mouth. It gives me anxiety to think about saying no, but I have to; now that I understand where this is coming from, I want to say no. I want to for my well being. I want to for the love of myself. It’s time that I turn saying no, into saying yes to me. So, this week, where can you say no without any explanation? How can you set up your boundaries in a loving way, while still loving yourself?
Go ahead an pick a card (or cards) from above. The lovely stone you see in the picture is tiger eye. Tigers Eye Stone is a crystal with lovely bands of yellow-golden color through it. This is a powerful stone that aids harmony and balance, and helps you to release fear and anxiety. It stimulates taking action, and helps you to make decisions with discernment and understanding, unclouded by your emotions. Traditionally it was carried as an amulet against curses or ill-wishing, and is known to give you courage, self confidence and strength of will. It enhances creativity and is one of the stones that aid kundalini awakening.
If you chose card #1: Your message this week is to keep your sense of humor, and don’t take things so seriously. Your card goes on to say that it’s so tempting to view life and all of its many manifestations, permutations, and variations of something to be taken quite seriously, yet this is exactly the opposite of what you need to do right now. No matter what the situation, look for the humor in it. It may take time to find something, but if you look for it with this attitude in mind, you begin to see the absurdities and ironies inherent in whatever shows up in life, even in the seemingly darkest circumstances. Maintaining a healthy sense of humor about most experiences causes you to be lighter in spirit, to smile unabashedly, and to appreciate life that much more. Turn that scowl upside down by doing what makes you openly laugh! Of course there are certainly times that require a more serious demeanor. Tragedies or traumatic experiences don’t call for cheerfulness and humor. When these events occur, appropriate social restrictions
apply that demand the expression of emotions congruent with the circumstances. However, these instances are temporary and like all things, will soon pass. Other than these kinds of situations, life’s ironies and absurdities abound. Rather than feeling personally victimized by these vagaries, take a deep breath, see the humor in the situation, and have a good laugh! Associations: Speed • Agility • Multitasking • Intelligence • Adaptability • Laughter • Humor • Ingenuity • Flexibility • Toning • Communication • Courage • Self care • Balance.
If you chose card #2: Your message this week is to stop complaining and focus your attention on the blessings in your life. Your card goes on to say that complaining about this or that is a way to blow off steam, which can be healthy to a degree, but ultimately, it isn’t very helpful — for you or anyone around you. Lift yourself up no matter what your present life circumstances are, face the day head on, and notice which thoughts you tend to put most of your attention on. Whatever the nature of those thoughts, the consequences manifest not only in your feelings, but eventually in the world around you. Power flows wherever your attention goes. Power is life force, or spirit. When your attention is focused on negative thoughts, negative experiences result. So whenever you notice yourself repeatedly attending to negative thoughts, practice shifting your attention to thoughts of gratitude. Consider the blessings in your life. What are the things that make you happy? You may find a discrepancy between what makes you happy and what you’re doing in your life right now. If
that’s the case, choose to alter one or the other: Either change your life and start doing what makes you happy, or change your thinking to enjoy whatever is happening in the moment. Its up to you. Associations: Sensitivity • Grounded • Clairsentience • Inquisitiveness • Uniqueness • Adaptability • Flexibility • Shyness • Grooming • Stability •
Inner Sight • Sense of humor.
If you chose card #3: Your message this week is that it’s time to strike out on your own and relinquish your overdependency on others. Your card goes on to say that it’s so easy to slip into a comfortable dependency with anything or anyone, from simple dependencies that can be healthy and restorative (such as daily exercise) to destructive and hard-core dependencies, such as an addiction. You may find yourself so totally hooked on another person that you lose yourself, always turning to that individual to either make decisions for you or to validate your own. This can apply to organizations and institutions as well. Those dependencies that you’re most familiar with are most likely born out of habit rather than conscious choice. To make truly autonomous decisions, don’t get caught up in the polarities of being dependent or independent. Instead, make those choices from a place where you maintain your own authority and power, and accept 100 percent responsibility for those choices and their consequences. Now is the time to review the people and things
upon which you were excessively and habitually dependent. Step back from them, identify the areas where you need to make some adjustments, and act accordingly. Practice setting boundaries, asking for what you want, and making decisions based on your own internal authority and autonomy. Association: Independence • Autonomy • Curiosity • Courage • Unpredictability • Perceptiveness • Cleverness • Resourcefulness • Intuition • Passion • Sensuality • Playfulness • Adventurousness • Stealth • Charisma • Gracefulness.
My hope for you this week is that you can stand tall. Allow the lessons you’ve learned along the way in loving yourself, to shine bright through your personal choices. Stand up for yourself and learn to say no in a way that’s taking care of your most basic needs. The only people who will be against that, are the ones who no longer need to be in your life.
This is your week! Make it an amazing one 🙂